Blog Siti Aisyah

Salam Semua...

Syukur Pada Yang Maha Berkuasa Tuhan Sekalian alam....

 Today after a long break..I'm back in the office. Tak banyak kerja pun just sibuk kan diri tengok orang-orang sekeliling termasuk lah proses pengambilan pegawai bomba. Kind of strict jugak lar... sebabnyer from 41 candidates yang datang cuma sorang jer yang layak untuk ke sessi temuduga esok. Total applicants about 100,000... (ramai yang mohon tapi yang dipanggil about 20,000 jer)

Today would be my last day of Puasa 6... alhamdulillah berjaya juga mengharungi cabaran dan dugaan. its all about mencari keredhaan dan keberkatan selain dari kenikmatan berbuka, my personal view puasa ni sangat sihat, hopefully diberikan Allah untuk jadikan amalan . InsyaAllah.

Today something unexpected happened... IJN called Diana for something that we are not ready. Eventually they asking us untuk cepatkan operation for Aqeela... Dr.Siva free this week after a girl schedule for operation posponed it to a new date. Diana just got back to work so things like this memang akan haywire kalau kita follow after we agreed that this coming 8th Sept will be the admission date.

Today also Diana discovered a very touching, inspired..and usefull blog to the parent especially to us. aisyahsijantunghatiku.blogspot.com  The Blog was really something that I've been looking for and why I'm started writing now is totally to share some little experience as a parent who has a children with special gift from God. Millions thanks to you En Sheikh and Puan Intan... I'll be contact you for some information that both of you have successfully gone truth.

To My Beloved wife... I know you were crying reading the blog.. even when I called you just now you were still crying. My voice may sound so cool pretending nothing happened but deep inside my heart it was really a difficult moment that both of us must go face and gone thru. I need you as much as you need me and so much Aqeela needs us... we must be strong and Papa love ibu so much...

  Permudahkan Ya Allah Segala urusan ku...

Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri

Salam Aidil Fitri buat semua...

Semoga dirahmati dan dikasihi Allah sentiasa. 

Ampun dan Maaf diminta sekiranya ada terkasar bahasa.. kerana sesungguhnya manusia itu
lemah tanpa akal dan fikiran , longlai tanpa taufik dan hidayah ..... hanya Iman dan Takwa sebagai pendinding diri demi kesejahteraan dunia dan akhirat. 

2nd Appointment

Alhamdulillah... Syukur kepada Allah ke atas pemberiannya yang menjadikan aku seorang insan yang redha dan tawakal atas ujian mu.

Hari yang dinantikan telah tiba... hari yang mungkin menentukan masa depan Aqeela. Sampai di IJN dalam pukul 1.15 tghari and sempat menunaikan Solat Jumaat bersama warga IJN di surau tingkat 7 (It was a parking lot yang telah diconvert jadi surau yang cantik).

Lepas selesai.. sempat tunai solat hajat 2 rakaat sebelum walk back to Paed Dept. Baby Aqeela still sleeping and tak ramai patient pun. But I did notice ada budak perempuan ni age dalam 5-7 years datang dengan mak dia and she is blue... Blue means you can actually see her lips.. fingers and skin is bluish colour. Rasa syukur sangat sebab ada Insan yang lebih teruk lagi keadaannya kalau nak compared dengan baby Aqeela.

Renungan Jauh Seorang Ibu

We met Dr.Siva after half hour of waiting... late 30's.. with glasses and very energetic. He look at Aqeela.. touch here and there and do some standard procedure. Open his monitor.. key in the code numbers and there it is.. all detail about Aqeela appeared at the screen. Lots of explanation, questions and answers regarding to what is our baby is having now.

Some example of the Images that appeared on the screen

Well..  our 1st visit dengan Dr Geetha its really tally dengan Dr. Siva nyer opinion. Since he is a surgeon the details on the operation was clearly explained.   The procedure is called an Open Heart Operation.. and it will take about 3-4 hours depends on baby condition. The method of closing back the holes they called it as Synthetic Patching which will grow together with the heart... tak sure what kind of material tapi I was been understood that it was kind of fabric like Dacron or Gore-tex.  I can't imagine a Gore-Tex inside my baby's heart... can you? 

To cut short.. we accepted apa yang Allah berikan ini ... mana mungkin terfikir pada akal dan fikiran ini yang baby Aqeela akan di cucuk ... di bius.... dibuka dadanya dan dikeluarkan jantungnya ... tapi itu semua yang akan kami hadapi pada 08 Sept 2013. Doa dan tawakal yang hanya mampu untuk saat dan tika ini.......... and as for now also we just wanna our Baby Aqeela to be healthy.

Aqeela love Papa.. and Ibu...

Majlis Aqiqah 04 July 2013

Alhamdulillah semua berjalan dengan lancar seperti yang dirancang. Alhamdulillah kerana semua tetamu yang dijemput hadir ke majlis aqiqah  ini. Alhamdulillah dikurniakan keluarga yang sama-sama membantu untuk majlis ini terutama Tok Pa and Tok Ma.

Majlis ni actually memang boleh dikatakan agak ad-hoc jugak lar sebab it took me almost 2 weeks to decide samada nak buat ke tak. Sebabnyer sebelum-sebelum ni semua baby yang ada dalam our family kurang-kurang after 3 months baru nak buat so this time macam cepat sikit . Lagi pun diana baru habis pantang so I think its a good move lar actually. After consult dengan diana , pa and ma .. hari yang we all pilih adalah khamis malam jumaat 4 July. Very simple majlis coz hanya jemput family, close friends, neighbours and orang surau.

 Majlis dimulakan dengan bacaan surah dan doa oleh Tuan Imam , kemudian di tahniq dan taqliq serta potong anak rambut sambil diiringi oleh bacaan selawat dan Salam buat Junjungan Besar Nabi Muhammmad S.A.W. Alhamdulillah  baby langsung tak nangis and maybe Aqeela dah biasa dengar papa dia dodoi camtu kot so macam cool jugak lar dia malam tu.

With Kak Long (Tudung) Kak Ngah (Baju Pink) Cousin Alesya

Personnaly... I'm touch bila tengok Imam pegang baby aqeela macam baby dia sendiri... rasa sebak sampai nak menitik air mata tengok aqeela masa tu.. Her eyes staring straight to Tok Imam and macam faham dengan doa yang sedang dibacakan . Rasa nya dugaan yang Allah berikan ini bagai satu nikmat yang sememangnyer aku sendiri tak pernah rasa. Permudahkanlah urusan ku Ya Allah... kerana hanya engkau yang mampu melakukannya... sejahterakanlah anak kecil ku ini... berikanlah aku peluang untuk menjadi seorang ayah, suami dan anak yang diberkati dan diredhai oleh mu. Amin

Sekali lagi buat keluarga tercinta My Beloved diana, kids, Pa n Ma, adik beradik...... those yang helping us directly or indirectly.... millions thanks to you guys for make it this aqiqah happened. Tak terbalas jasa kalian semua and love uols so much. Maaf sekiranya ada salah dan silap..halalkan sekiranya ada yang terlebih atau terkurang sepanjang majlis ini dilangsungkan.

Ain Afra (Budak kecik ni pon tolong kemas gak)..hehehe

SELAMAT BERPUASA

SALAM RAMADHAN

KEPADA SELURUH UMAT ISLAM , KELUARGA, SAHABAT HANDAI DAN KENALIAN SEKALIAN.. SELAMAT BERPUASA DI BULAN RAMADHAN YANG MULIA INI DAN SESUNGGUHNYA NIKMAT KENYANG ITU BERSIFAT SEMENTARA SAHAJA 

YANG KEKAL ABADI ADALAH AMALAN DAN IBADAH YANG DIKERJAKAN.

MARILAH KITA BERSAMA-SAMA BERTAFAKUR DAN BERSYUKUR ATAS KEHADIRAN BULAN RAMADHAN YANG PENUH KEBERKATAN INI.

INSYAALLAH

P/S: Akan ke IJN pada hari Jumaat ini untuk appointment dengan pakar bedah Dr.Siva. Semoga dipermudahkan dan diberi kekuatan oleh Allah . Amin

Hari Ini Dalam Sejarah

Syukur kepada Allah yang Maha Penyayang dan Maha Mengasihi...

Alhamdulillah.. we finally arrived at IJN after 1 hour and 15 mins drive.. as today is Monday and everybody is like rushing to the office at this hour. Weather still bad and traffic congested all the way from Shah Alam. Really difficult to put in words how I feel about it... berserah kepada Yang Maha Kuasa.

The last time I was here was during Diana's uncle bypass operation. Alhamdulillah he's fine now. We walk straight to the reception counter which at the left side as you enter the lobby. Eventually IJN already separated the adult and kid area.. we were ushered to the Paediatric Department which located exactly in front of the open space parking. Lucky me not so many people at this hour and registration really quick and fast. Your kid need to be photograph for the record and few documents need to be sign. Once completed they gave me a Green File and from there I need to complete few procedure before doctor's consultation. 

                                                                  X-Ray Room.

New patient will need to go for the X-Ray and for pregnant mother, you are not allowed in here! Aqeela so far ok lar... tak cry pun since it was really fast. Nak bukak baju dia lagi lama dari buat X-Ray.. hehehhe. I was being inform that the X-Ray film will be send straight to Doctor.. so no need to bring A3 size envelope everywhere just like those days. After X-Ray we went for another test ... ECG Test

Not so long of waiting once you place the Green File in the ECG room, person in charge will call your name. Well... this time Aqeela doesn't like it at all. Some kind of stickers were placed on her body and wires from the machine clipping the sticker. She cried and time ni memang start rasa sebak sangat seeing my baby like that. Aqeela strong Ok...papa and Ibu sayang Aqeela.

Once completed we move to Room 903 for weight scale and file submission. Alhamdulillah ada peningkatan berat badan Aqeela and the oksigen level in her body was 100%. 

From here, we have to wait to see Dr. Geetha.... lama gak lar . Lucky for us baby sleep dalam carrier so tak lar susah sangat. It almost 11 am and ramai patient kat IJN ni especially parents with kids. Now I realized that kat Malaysia ni memang banyak kes sakit jantung yang tidak mengira umur. Infact ada yang lebih teruk keadaannya... syukur Alhamdulillah........Ya Allah... berikanlah aku kesabaran dalam menempuh ujian yang engkau berikan ini. 

We finally being call up by nurse to see Dr. Geetha and there were some questions and answers between us  before she start the echo test .. just like in KPJ before. At this point of time, tak tau lah nak cakap apa dalam hati ni.. just berserah kepada Allah jer. Sebelum ni KPJ informed ada TOF and ASD,  hopefully its a good news. Lama jugak lar doc check and few time stopping coz Aqeela crying. Almost 20 minutes she sat back and start explaining.

Your daughter is having what we call VSD... Vetrical Septal Defect and also a bit of ASD. The vetricular septum is a bit overriding to the left and that might be the reason why KPJ diagnosed its a TOF. Well, I don't really agree its a TOF anyway as for my evaluation. As for now her body still accepting a sufficient amount of blood and oxygen in the heart but we can't wait too long. Blood overflow may cause damage to the heart and we don't want that to happen. The solution is to do the surgery not more than 3 months from now. 

Tears flow and our heart were touched again. Its a difficult moment for both of us again.

Ya Allah Ya Tuhan ku... Ujian yang Engkau berikan ini sesungguh amat berat bagi ku.. permudahkanlah segala urusan ku dan berikanlah aku ketabahan dan kesabaran dalam menempuh ujian mu ini. 

Super Hazzy:JDT

Cuaca oh cuaca....

Its look like being in the highland with the mist and fogs around... unfortunately it was humid, hot and hazzy... I wish to stay longer here just like before... good food and good hotel ... Errkkk with this kind of weather sorry babe. Quickly finishing my work.. get the tix change immediately, lucky me I got a seat ...poor me the flight delayed almost 3 hours.

Tak inform pun Diana I'm coming back... so macam wat suprised gitewww. Received call from her masa dalam taxi tapi buat-buat mcm busy or else kantoi lar balik awal. Sampai jer rumah , rang the bell and Diana welcoming her husband with the biggest smile.

Actually my mind wasn't in JB at all since I left the house at 6 am . Since it was my first ever fieldwork after Aqeela was born I left the house with a blundered heart. I really don't like it..and I must do something about it and please help me God. Ya Allah ya tuhanku permudahkan lah urusan ku ini.Well, definitely no other reason to be safely back at home just to be with my family especially Aqeela.

still dont know what to expect for this coming 24th...

26 Days

Salam....

Syukur pada Yang Maha Esa yang memberikan limpahan kenikmatan kekuatan diri untuk menempuh hari-hari yang mendatang.

Today Aqeela dah masuk 26 hari and we just got back from KPJ for check-up. Guess what... she is 900 gm    heavier than before. Alhamdulillah, despite of the muntah-muntah lepas minum milk she actually gain weight and that is a good sign of body and health development.

Cuak jugak sebelum masuk jumpa Dr Ling tadi... however lepas consultation, rasa syukur kepada Allah yang amat sangat sebabnya Aqeela had shown a positive feedback. Masih teringang-ngiang di telinga dengar explanation from dok. regarding Aqeela nyer health and untill now, hanya doa dan tawakal kepada Allah sebelum we go to see IJN Specialist next week.

At this point what I would like to share :

1. Bersyukur dengn apa yang telah Allah berikan... no matter what
2. Even Aqeela positive ada heart problems just give her the same treatment macam anak2 lain... ( rasanya mcm bagi extra jer...hehehehe)
3. Always support each other... hubby and wife.. but I must give credits to Diana sbb dia yang byk berkorban masa tidoq ... Aqeela malam jer dia restless skit . Papa take over bila Ibu dah tak larat.
4. Doa dan tawakal ... bacaan surah-surah Al-Quran selepas Magrib atau Isya dan Subuh. (selain dari usaha perubatan moden, hanya Allah yang maha berkuasa untuk menyembuhkannya..InsyaAllah).

Dengan Izin Allah.. hari ini Oksigen supplied is 100 % which means she is as good as normal baby. Alhamdulillah Ya Rabbi Ya Karim.

The Truth...

Almost 20 minutes in the echo test room while Dr Zul placing the ultrasound probe (something like scanner on Aqeela's body) and he keep on looking on something like x-tray image on the monitor screen. Applying soft gel on the probe he move up and down..left and right . Baby Aqeela doesn't like coz even bila ibu dia nak bukak baju for bath pon dia marah inikan pulak doktor yang letak something. She started to cry... Well dear,  papa can't do anything coz we need to do this and it will be just for couple of minutes k... Doktor stopped for a while lepas tengok Aqeela marah semacam.. and ask Ibu to breast feed her. Senyap jap lar... tapi dengar suara tu macam sedu-sedu sedih sangat jer.

We started back the procedure all over again and this time Doktor snap few pictures... I don't really know what it is.. tapi screen tu gambar jantung with blue and red color and also when he printed it was a black and white picture( after doing some reading baru tau rupanya its the oksigen supplied from the left and right compartment of the heart). Entahlar.... by looking at Dr Zul's face its not gonna be a good sign and i know something is not right.

Datuk Dr Zul took out a piece of paper and few pictures and started to draw something identical to the pictures which i just saw on the screen.

He explained..." This is a normal heart.... the blood comes from here goes here... and what is your baby is having now her blood coming from here and it go to a little bit to the upper side and this is ASD ( Atrial Septal Defect) and another one what we called the TOF (Tetratogy of Fallot) and her oxygen in the blood is less than normal . He explaining further however, I don't give so much attention anymore coz dah macam taknak dengar apa-apa dah and tak tau nak cakap apa... it just that hati kecil berkata-kata Ya Allah, ujian apakah ini ?"

Aqeela..... Papa tak caya lar baby papa ni tak sihat. Papa tengok you minum macam kakak-kakak you... you tido macam kak long u ...Ur body macam kak ngah nyer body...bila u nak milk you bunyi sikit-sikit jer macam kak long... bila you tido nak ada bau ibu macam kak ngah and both of them sihat walafiat... and why this thing could happened to you baby....

Trying to act normal but it just hopeless for a while.......

We walk out from the room with questions that just can't be put into words. I can see tear drops from diana's beautiful eyes but it doesn't mean anything any more except for.... Why Me?? Why Us???Why Baby Aqeela Adi Faizal???????????????? MasyaAllah... Maha Suci Allah... Istifar dan selawat hanya di bibir buat pegangan. Bagi insan yang baru menerima berita yang anaknya adalah pengidap penyakit Jantung Berlubang......its really something....Both of us know this is a new chapter in our life and Allah know the best.....  

From the room we went back to Dr Ling's office and he explaining to us what is the reasons of the Murmur sound that had been in Aqeela's body since her birth. She is having a congenital heart defect... and there are few circumstances and procedures need to be done for the best of her. What is good about Aqeela, her blood vessel in the heart is a bit wider and that prevented her from having a Blue Baby Syndrome. (Actually BBS ni baby akan jadi biru especially  bila minum milk, nangis etc) Alhamdulillah.... that answered why she just as normal and as fine as other baby.

Where do I start from here... I need a 2nd opinion I guess... since this is the beginning can we get a letter from you to refer us to other specialist..What Do you think Dr.? 
         That would be absolutely fine ... I recommended you to this 2 places... IJN or Glenagles..? 

Ya Allah ya tuhanku sesungguhnya hambamu ini kecil dan kerdil . Dengan kehendak dan ketentuan mu itu berikanlah kekuatan kepadaku untuk melalui fasa baru ini yang tidak terlintas dengan akal dan fikiran keranan sesungguhnya engkau Maha Pengasih dan Penyayang.

*Alhamdulillah manage to get a date to refer IJN this coming 24th June.... 

My Heart

The Day we both know she is special... 

Papa Love You.. Baby

Dengan Nama Allah Yang Maha Pemurah Lagi Maha Penyayang.......
The whole nite , Takleh nak tido sangat sebab memikirkan pasal Baby Aqeela. I do some reading on the MurMur Sound and what I've found was really unpredictable. It can be various reasons so sangat berdebar-debar bila nak walk -in into Dr.Ling's office.

Are you ok B ? Baby Aqeela Ok ker? What is the result ? What are we gonna face? Is it good and normal or is it bad and worst?

1001 satu soalan bermain di mindaku ini sampai takleh nak tido dibuatnyer. After solat subuh and preparing breakfast for Kakak and adik we went to KPJ with doa dan tawakal. Diana tak banyak cakap and she only holding Aqeela with love and affection. Anyway Aqeela pakai baju tulisan "I Love Mummy" jeles papa jap...

As we walk into Dr. Ling office and he approaching us with his great smile asking us how's the baby and bla..bla.. dia mintak letak Aqeela on the bed. Putting his stetoskop few places on Aqeela's body and he finally speak...

Yup... the sound is still there but i cannot confirm anything until we do the echo test... 

Macam nak pitam pon ada sebab at this time macam-macam lak yang come across my mind. Ya Allah ... ujian apakah ini? Naper kena buat echo test lak... naper tak macam kakak-kakak dia... Just follow the visit schedule. Diana dah tak tahan nak nangis and she cried even kita lom tahu what to expect . With that, Dr Ling had referred us to the Cardiac Specialist Datuk Dr Zul to carry the echo test.

Almost eleven o'clock baru dapat jumpa specialist since its an unscheduled  appointment. I had mixed feeling about this.. and same goes with Diana. Both of us praying the best for our beloved Aqeela...

Ya Allah ampunilah dosa hamba mu yang hina ini....

First Week Checkup

Alhamdulillah...Syukur kepada Pencipta Alam yang masih memberiku nyawa untuk terus menulis ....... Well, it has been a week after Aqeela was born . Muka dia dah kurang bengkak and mata pun dah kurang sepet...or else macam anak jepun. On 29 Mei, Me and my beloved diana going to KPJ for Aqeela's first checkup. Kind of excited sebab dah lama tak guna baby carrier yang telah diperturunkan since our first Princess Adriana.. she is 8 now. As usual KPJ Shah Alam memang tak pernah sunyi and sentiasa ramai. Eventually Diana also went for her check so we got 2 numbers in queue but alhamdulillah not so long of waiting Aqeela went for weighing dulu. She is 270 gram heavier from first day born. Our 1st checkup actually went so well until Dr.Ling discover something pada Baby Aqeela. Her heart berdegup dengan kadar yang agak laju... normal children around 110-160 per minit and there is a "Murmur" sound which he also tak boleh nak confirm until we go for the Ultrasound check or Echocardiography . Just nak bagi tau yang this is my first ever heard about this procedure sbb tak pernah terlintas pon such proses. As for now, Me and diana are praying the best for Aqeela since the procedure will only be done on the 4th June (Tuesday). As usual baby Aqeela was totally fine and she don't show any sign or symptoms of heart difficulty. Papa love you so much. "Ya Allah Ya Tuhan ku , peliharakanlah hamba mu ini dari segala malapetaka dan musibah sesungguhnya engkau maha mengetahui"

Welcoming My 3rd Princess Aqeela

On 22nd of Mei 2013 at 3.58 pm my new princess finally born to the world. After hard long 7 hours of pain in the labor room she is finally say Assalamualaikum papa. Really excited and really looking forward. As for now she will be known as Aqeela Adi Faizal. Baby weight 3.2 kg and 51 cm of length and for newborn she was a good and fine baby. Alhamdulillah.

Work...Work..Eat..eat .Sleep and play

well... working hard may not my style but working smart is my preference. I may look buzy... (LLB) Look like Busy but actually is not. hahahahah. Sometimes i felt that this place is not i"m suppose to be... being attach with public which i had done for the past 10 years may be what i like most. Though this is the responsibility i had to carry yet my little heart say... "Common you deserved better place". Just forget about it... Anyway the picture above was one of most memorable moment during my journey in Thailand. The market was actually on the railway was really awesome. Can't image if i were the butcher or fishmonger. If time permitted i wouldn't mind to have a visit again here. That about it... i'm hungry and need something to munchin....

Cafe Racer Dream Bike

This is a kind of bike that i always dream off. Feels like building a cafe racer bike but its not an easy job. Its not only knowledge and skill but must have patient and courage and most important the RM... Anyway hopefuly my dreams come thru. It just a matter of time and the fastest way is just buy one from mudah.my . heheheee